Wolf Moon
by brattyteenagewerewolf
Summary: Emil had all but given up on love. He'd been lonely but he was used to it, he could handle it, especially with everything else going on. But then Kaoru walked into his life and turned it upside down. wolf!verse side story, set after hair of the dog.


**A/N: as requested by starrynights1987. Yet another oneshot for the wolf!verse, this time with Emil and Kaoru! set after the events in hair of the dog.**

**The name is based on the official name for the January full moon (in the northern hemisphere) when it was hardest to get food. One of the origins of the name comes from a native american tribe who called it thus because they'd hear wolves howling with hunger nearby at the time. But it also represents things changing for the better as it is when the days start growing longer. See, I can do meaningful titles! Wolfsbane as well had deeper meaning even if I forgot to explain it…**

_Walk the dark path  
Sleep with angels  
Call the past for help  
Touch me with your love  
And reveal to me my true name_

_Oh how I wish_  
_For soothing rain_  
_All I wish is to dream again_  
_My loving heart_  
_Lost in the dark_  
_For hope I'd give my everything_  
_Oh how I wish_  
_For soothing rain_  
_Oh how I wish to dream again_  
_Once and for all_  
_And all for once_  
_Nemo my name forevermore_

_Nemo- Nightwish_

.o.)O(.o.

_I was lonely. I know it was stupid to think so, I mean come on, I've lived with three other guys for almost a century. And when I say they don't know what personal space is I mean it._

_Lukas would never leave me alone. He acted like a brooding hen around me. You'd think he was my mother the way he carried (and still carries) on. Emil it isn't healthy to eat so much liquorice, let me make you something else. Emil get off the computer and out of your room, you're being antisocial. Emil I'm making hot chocolate do you want some? I mean for crying out loud you do realise I'm almost a century old right? I can look after myself...And then there was the whole 'call me big brother' thing. He doesn't do it so often these days but every now and then he'll bug me about it. He's not my brother but he insists on me calling him such, where the hell is his logic? It isn't going to happen! He keeps going on about us being related and all but I don't believe him._

_Matthias may be louder and more obnoxious but at least he doesn't get in my face so often. He's normally too busy bugging Lukas. On the one hand that's a good thing since it distracts him from annoying me but on the other I'm sick of walking in on them. Because apparently it is too difficult to walk a few metres to their bedroom and close the door. No, let's do it on the couch! Or the kitchen! Or I don't know, THE PASSAGE IN FRONT OF EMIL'S ROOM! There are things I really don't want to have to see let alone fall over..._

_I can't really say much about Tino, I haven't known him for as long. He seems nice enough. A bit too peppy maybe but not as bad as Matthias. He can't cook though. At all. If the house is still standing when I get back I'll be stunned because he's come close to setting the kitchen alight several times already and Berwald can't say no to him._

_Berwald, he's alright. He keeps to himself just as much as I do so we get along pretty well. Of course it's annoying when he gets into a fight with Matthias since they never fail to destroy the furniture and get blood on the carpet. Do you know how hard it is to get blood out of the carpet? No? You have no idea how lucky you are..._

_And it happens all the time! Every few days I'd get woken up by snarling wolves instead of sleeping in till noon. And if you think Lukas is bad in the morning you haven't seen me. I end up shouting at them both before Lukas gets pissy and tells me to calm down or at least go to bed at a reasonable time so he doesn't have to deal with me being a nightmare._

_I swear, I sometimes wish my pack was less... Well them._

_I mean most packs would try to solve the problem that is the alpha and the beta being at each other's throats all the time. Us? We make bets on when Berwald will kill Matthias._

_I'm not kidding. Lukas says it'll be the third of March 2031. I have my money on the twenty first of January 2040. Course Matthias's life expectancy has probably increased now that Berwald has Tino. He's not quite as prone to taking Matthias's bait now. We might have to include Tino in on the bets now…_

_It's actually ridiculous how relaxed Berwald's become. He actually smiled at me the other day. It scared the crap out of me… That's the funny thing about finding your mate. It calms you down a lot. So I really don't want to know what Matthias was like before he met Lukas. He must have been unbearable which makes it even more surprising that Berwald hasn't killed him. God knows I want to before I get my morning coffee... Granted I want to kill most people when I'm like that._

_Finding your mate does change you a lot though. Even Lukas has noticed that I'm not hiding away in my room so much now. He still gives me hell if I do it for an hour or so though... Apparently I'm not allowed time to myself. Thankfully he's in Africa at the moment and I'm in China so I can do as I damn well please._

_At the same time though it's terrifying. I saw what Berwald went through when Tino got hurt by that damn hell hound and I don't know if I could have managed it. By falling for him I was risking having to leave my pack. I may complain about them but they're still family to me. If Matthias had lost that fight against Yao I would have lost them. I know it hurts Kaoru to have had to leave his pack and I feel awful for being glad that it wasn't me... Even without that, having to face the fact that you fell head over feet for a complete stranger? It's unnatural and coming from a werewolf that's saying something. I mean, I know it's supposed to be something that comes later. The love I mean. It's meant to be infatuation first, then like and then love. Getting hit by all three at the same time is frustrating and headache inducing. How are you meant to say you love someone when you don't even know their name?_

_But it happens. Right when you least expect it. Normally when it's a real bad time too._

_Sure, the fact that I was no longer alone was nice. Watching Berwald and Tino as they tried to sort through their issues but still treat one another with such adoration (seriously, Tino was obviously falling for him from the beginning. Why he was being so stubborn I don't know...)... Well it kind of sucked. I felt glad for Berwald since he'd been alone for so long but now I was the only one left. The loneliness was painful even if I wouldn't admit it._

_But the timing..._

_We had a hell hound on the loose, a hell hound that almost killed Tino might I add. Vampires were plotting against us. All the packs had to somehow work together and what do I do? I fall in love. No fall in love is putting it lightly; it came into my life and hit me with a mallet. I had my life organised even if that life was lonely. I was focussed on the task at hand._

_Kaoru had to just walk into my life and distract me. And when I say distract me I mean it. I've worked hard to appear so apathetic damn it and then he walks in with those dark eyes and sleek hair and nice ass-_

"You think I have a nice ass?"

Emil jumped, his laptop almost falling to the floor before he managed to grab it. "You were reading over my shoulder?" he growled as he set the computer aside. He hadn't even heard Kaoru come into the room let alone realised he'd been reading what he was writing.

The Asian shrugged, seeming unconcerned by the accusation. "You were so entranced by what you were writing that I couldn't resist."

"You weren't supposed to see that! There's a reason I don't tell anyone that I have a blog… they'd bug me all the time." Emil grumbled. His eyes were darting between the dark haired man kneeling on his bed and his computer. He hated leaving his entries half complete but also wasn't too fond of anyone seeing what he was writing.

"You actually post this online? Saying you're a werewolf and everything?"

"I pretend I'm a role-player. I'll even do the occasional role play to enforce the idea. No-one believes I'm actually a werewolf; it sounds too crazy to be true. Besides, it's better than hanging out with the others. They tend to drive me up the wall after too much exposure to them…"

Kaoru shrugged, apparently satisfied by the answer. "Are you going to finish writing?"

"Are you going to read over my shoulder and judge me for it?"

There was a soft laugh before Emil found his lips caught in a chaste kiss that still managed to make him blush slightly. "Of course not. I love you…" there was still that slight awkwardness in the way the words were said but Emil didn't mind. Neither of them were the best at communicating how they felt verbally, at least not in this form.

He sighed, responding to the kiss briefly before pulling away to grab his laptop once more. "Fine you can stay… I guess." He mumbled softly. He felt Kaoru's chin resting on his shoulder but paid it no mind as he continued typing.

_So as I was saying before said person with a nice ass interrupted me (Stop smirking Kaoru or I'll take back what I said about you staying) it was really bad timing. Awful timing. Let's invade Russia in the middle of winter bad timing. I had to deal with my own emotions, the risk of dying and the suddenly horrifying idea of losing someone I loved more than life itself who I didn't even know well because logic doesn't exist for people like me._

_Hell, I still don't know him. We've only been together for a couple of months and a good portion of that was spent fearing for our lives. How can I say I know him when I don't even know what his favourite colour is?_

_Okay, red apparently. Damn it Kaoru, I'm trying to write and that was a rhetorical question so stop distracting me._

_Regardless we somehow, god knows how, made it work. The hell hounds are gone, the vampires are dead and the packs, well we still don't get along per say but we're getting there. We're not killing one another at least. And the person I love, the person who's making me sound like such a sap (stop laughing Kaoru… and I can see what you're doing…) is still here._

_Hell, he took me to China so he is more than just here. I would love to say more about China but I don't think that's going to happen unless A CERTAIN SOMEONE GETS HIS HAND OUT FROM UNDER MY SHIRT! DAMN IT KAORU, WHAT PART OF TRYING TO WRITE DON'T YOU GET?_

_None of it apparently…_

_In short: I met a guy. I like him. I went to China. I somewhat like China even if I haven't seen as much as I would've liked. The guy I like is an ass and way too good with his hands so I can't tell you why I like China and is why I haven't seen as much of China as I wanted._

_Now for Christ's sake Kaoru! At least let me hit post before you do any of that!_

.o.)O(.o.

"Hey I thought you said no-one knew about your blog?" Kaoru asked softly as he glanced at the post from the previous night. The laptop had never been shut down properly so it was still on the same page.

Emil sighed, grabbing his shirt and pulling it on as he stared at the Asian impatiently. "They don't. They don't know how to use tumblr because I specifically didn't show them how. I was the first to ever bother to learn how to use a computer since they were still trying to get a grip on the radio."

"Well apparently they caught on…"

"What?!"

"Alpha of the North likes this and says 'You didn't have to go all the way to China if you were just going to fuck each other senseless. And what do you mean obnoxious?'. Norwegian Wolf likes this and says 'I apologise for Matthias, Tino showed him this site and he's acting like a child. Why didn't you tell us you had a blog? And we are related so stop trying to deny it.' Swedish Wolf likes this. Moomin Loving Wolf likes this and says 'Hei Emil! I didn't know you had a blog! Why didn't you tell me? Glad you and Kaoru are having fun! Did you know that none of the others could use tumblr? I would have thought you'd have shown them since they all say you were the one to teach them how to use the computer… don't worry, the house is still standing! Promise!' and all of them are now following you."

Emil groaned. "Damn it… that's what I get for not clearing my internet history…" he grumbled before grabbing the laptop and furiously typing out a response. He'd never considered the fact that Tino wouldn't be as technologically challenged as the others.

He was going to have to find a new blog now…


End file.
